Dec. 10, 2025
The other day, I had a meeting with a guy who used to work at Hinge, the dating app with the slogan "designed to be deleted."
We got to talking about messaging—what makes someone reply, what gets in the way, and the mental blocks that keep people from saying yes to a date.
As he was sharing, it got me thinking.
We’ve been testing outbound campaigns this year and experimenting with what actually gets people to reply. I’ve read books, watched videos, studied the frameworks.
But the insights this Hinge guy shared in 30 minutes was far more valuable than 99% of the same old B2B outbound advice out there.
Because it goes deeper.
It recognizes something we often forget in sales and partnerships: deep down, we're all people with fears, insecurities, mental blocks, and desires.
And good messaging doesn’t bulldoze past that. It meets people there.
On a dating app, users are asking many of the same questions your target audience is asking when you send them a DM on LinkedIn:
- “What's their real motive here?”
- "Are our values aligned?"
- "Is this a scam?"
So instead of downloading the next B2B outbound framework that showed up in my feed, I decided to go straight to the relationship experts.
And 10+ hours of content consumption later, our outbound campaigns are performing better than ever. 😅
This week, every single one of our clients has a 30% or higher positive reply rate on their LinkedIn outbound campaigns (industry average is 10–20%).
Here’s what Jillian Turecki, Matthew Hussey, the Gottmans, and so many other brilliant relationship experts said, and what we've implemented into our outbound strategy:
💬 “Don’t come on too strong.”
In dating: No one wants a 10-paragraph message before the first coffee.
In outbound: Keep your first message short, curious, and low-pressure. Your goal is conversation, not conversion.
👀 “Your profile matters more than you think.”
In dating: People stalk before they respond. The words you use send signals.
In outbound: Your LinkedIn presence is your landing page. If it’s all fluff or outdated, you're ghosted before you even hit send. If your values don't shine through, a potential values-aligned partner will think you're just like the rest.
🎣 “Ask better questions.”
In dating: “So… what do you do for fun?” doesn't cut it.
In outbound: Personalize with real intent. Ask something that shows you’ve done your homework and value their time.
👸 “Confidence is attractive. Desperation is not.”
In dating: People are drawn to confidence, not pressure. Seeking validation is so out.
In outbound: Lead with what you offer, not what you need. Don't beg for time; extend an opportunity.
⏳ “Attraction builds over time.”
In dating: Healthy connections grow slowly over time as trust builds.
In outbound: Nurture the long game. Follow up with relevance. Show up consistently. Most wins don’t come from a single message; they come from trust over time.
Bottom line: Good outbound, like dating, is about intentionality and value. And humans can smell desperation and misalignment from a mile away. You're also battling a string of bad experiences that have come before you, so proving that you're different is essential (we're all skeptical nowadays).
Ask: Where can I show more clarity, alignment, and humanity here?
Whether you're building a partnership in life or in business, without those three, it won’t last.
What's the best relationship advice you've ever received?
Keep learning!
Brynne
p.s. Hinge reports 77% of its users say "digital body language" cues (tone, prompt‑style answers, how someone writes, response speed, etc.) strongly influence whether they trust the other person enough to reply. What is your digital body language saying about you on LinkedIn? Food for thought.
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